24 Weeks
Written on 11 April 2009 by AmyI’m posting our 24 week photos 2 weeks late because we’ve had a lot going on lately. All is well. They are growing ahead of schedule and we have picture confirmation that we’re having a boy and a girl. Our last appointment was the anatomy scan, and we confirmed that everyone has the correct anatomy – hands, arms, legs, feet, brain hemispheres, heart chambers, etc.
We’re still trying to get everything ready. The rooms are finally painted, but we have yet to actually pick out a theme. It’s an amazing amount of work getting ready for babies… Even just trying to pull together a registry is crazy. Who knew that babies needed so much stuff?! For some of the bigger items – like swings and saucers we’re just putting in 1 rather then 2. For starters, we don’t have the room for two of everything, and I think they can be doing different things at different times – one in the swing, one in the bouncer, etc.
There is definitely more kicking going on these days. I mostly feel it when I’m laying in bed at night, but they are becoming more active during the day. The girl seems to be the wild one with the boy more mellow. I’ve read that their personalities in the womb reflect their personalities once they are born… so we’ll see.
Other then that things are just moving along…
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- 24 Weeks – Boy – Profile and Confirmation
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- 24 Weeks – Girl – Profile and Foot
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- 24 Weeks – Girl – Confirmation
25 Random Things About My Dog
Written on 22 March 2009 by AmyTomorrow we have to put down our dog Alex. We fought with everything we had over the past 2 weeks to save his life from what the DR’s believe is lymphoma (cancer) in his brain that came on suddenly and with a vengence.
Just a month ago, I posted this “Note” on Facebook. When the trend was going around to post 25 random facts about yourself, I much preferred to post 25 random facts about him because he is that special. At the time I wrote it I recall thinking I wanted to preserve many of the special memories I had of him. I had no idea that the wheels were about to fall off the wagon.
We’re beyond heartbroken at the thought of losing him tomorrow, but we have to do what’s best for him.
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1. He’s a 5-year old Border Collie named Alex
2. He’s almost 65 pounds, which is about 20 pounds bigger then the average Border Collie. He’s not overweight – just tall and long.
3. We Alex to keep our other dog, Harvey, company. Unfortunately Harvey passed away unexpectedly about a year and a half later.
4. We feel bad that Alex is alone all day, so we take him to Metro Dog once a week so he can be part of a pack. He loves loves loves it there. Play with the pack for a few hours, sleep for a few hours, play with the pack for a few hours… and so on all day.
5. He won’t play with other dogs until he knows them really well. What he usually does is find a group of dogs and herd them. Especially at the dog park – he will find a group and run constant circles around them. Most people find it pretty amusing. He feels like he’s doing his job.
6. Speaking of jobs, he’s happiest when he has a job. Since we don’t have any sheep at our house, we’ve taken to naming all his toys, hiding them around the house, and then telling him which one to go get. He knows all the names of his 20+ toys, and his retrieval success rate is usually around 85%.
7. He has recently decided that he needs a job when I’m in the shower. He’ll come up and tap on the glass and then stare at me expectantly. So I tell him which toy to get an off he goes.
8. He knows “upstairs” and “downstairs”. When we’re downstairs and tell him “birdy” is “upstairs” he’ll run up looking for it. If he’s having a hard time finding it we hear him running around and jumping on/off the bed in his pursuit. He’s persistent.
9. He was raised with cats (who were raised with Harvey). So they all have a healthy respect for each other. One of our cats loves him more then he loves us. He is Alex’s little shadow. Follows him around everywhere…jumping on the bed when Alex jumps on the bed, jumps off when he jumps off and does everything he possibly can to lay next to him and mark him by rubbing on him. Alex is a good sport about it for the most part, but sometimes he gets a little frustrated and bares his teeth at him or snaps at him. Doesn’t faze the cat a bit.
10. He’s not allowed to herd the cats, but he is allowed to police their scratching in forbidden places. If the cats are scratching someplace they are not supposed to he will run up and insert himself between the cat and said object. Sometimes he’ll bare his teeth a little (he doesn’t understand that cats don’t know what teeth baring means). But he’s effective.
11. If he thinks the cats are fighting (not playing) he’ll insert himself between them. He doesn’t always know the difference, but we tell him that they’re okay, and he settles back down.
12. He likes to spoon – and I like having a big warm fluffy dog to snuggle with.
13. He likes to lay on my pillow between the headboard and my head and lay his face on my shoulder. The cat sleeps there at night, and Drew told Alex to lay there one night as a joke. He liked it so much that he lays there all the time now. We don’t let him sleep on the bed, but he can come visit.
14. Alex knows his place in the pack. Unlike Harvey, there is no question that we are higher in the pack order then he is – and he is super sweet and eager to please.
15. We have a dog door built into the service door between the garage and the backyard, and he has a bed in the garage. He can go back and forth while we’re at work. When the garage door opens he goes straight to his bed and stays there until we pull the cars in or out and close the garage door. It’s a relief because Harvey would always take off down the court at every opportunity. Alex mostly stays in the yard.
16. He’s good with kids. We’ve been saying for years that the dog needs a “boy” to play with. We’re happy that he’s going to get his wish before he’s too old to enjoy it.
17. He gets anxious when we get anxious. If we’re reacting to a movie or video game he will either attempt to bury himself on the upset person or go snuggle with the other of us. It doesn’t take much – we never yell in the house. Just raising our voice in frustration upset him.
18. Based on advice, we tried playing a recording of a baby crying loudly to get him used to the sounds. It didn’t bother him a bit. I think he might get a bit freaky when he hears actual babies crying and upset in the house – babies that are part of his pack.
19. He loves car rides (no surprise) but we had to work with him for about 2 years to get him to this point. We got him from a breeder in Fort Bragg – and he threw up 3 times in the first 20 minutes on the way home (very windy road). From then on he’d turn green and start to drool in the car, sometimes eventually throwing up. We spent a lot of time taking him on short trips with great rewards (dog park, Petco). Sometimes we’d put him in the car and just drive around our neighborhood for a few minutes, or sometimes we made him lay in the car in the garage for a few minutes. Now he’s fine. Our longest trip with him was to Vegas and back.
20. When we first brought him home, Harvey was 9. Alex was a little puppy coming into his house, but it soon become apparent that Alex was going to be higher in the pack order. Harvey was very submissive to other dogs. Dogs figure these things out naturally, and Alex just assumes more of a leader role most of the time.
21. We stopped taking him to the dog park regularly because it seemed like there was always an aggressive dog there. Alex doesn’t start anything, but he doesn’t back down easily either when another dog is pushing the boundaries.
22. His favorite thing to do is play Frisbee. He’s really good at it. We play with him in the back yard 3 times a day on average. He’d play all day if we would only oblige.
23. He’s gone through a lot of toys over the years. For the most part he’s not destructive with his toys but eventually he’ll chew holes in them. He does, however, still have the very first toy we named for him. It’s dirty – but no holes.
24. He’ll learn the name of a new toy within minutes. Like children he loves when we bring a new toy home, and we start working with him right away so he knows which toy it is … foxy, birdy, rabbit, bear, etc. We’ll throw it and say “Go get horsey!”
25. He’s our last dog for a while. Including Harvey, Drew has had dogs for the past 15 years and while they bring a lot of love into the house they are also a lot of work. We feel bad that Alex doesn’t have another dog in his pack, but we lucked out with him. He is a really good boy and I worry that the next dog might turn out to be hell on wheels. You just never know – like people they all have their own personalities – and only so much of that is nature vs nurture.
18 Weeks
Written on 20 February 2009 by AmyI’ve been bad about updating the blog… And then people remind they are still reading, so I put in the effort. Because hey, if you can stand reading it, I can certainly stand writing it! Things are just so busy, and so much to think about and plan. It gets a little crazy sometimes.
We had our 18 week appt last week and everything is still on track. We’re almost definitely having a boy and a girl. The girl was measuring 18 weeks, 4 days, 9 oz and the boy was measuring 18 weeks, 2 days, 8 oz – both were ahead of schedule considering our appt was at 17 weeks, 5 days. The DR expressed a little surprise that the boy was smaller than the girl – it’s usually the exact opposite. Since they are both ahead of schedule she said it was fine. I meant to ask her if fetuses have “growth spurts” but that’ll have to wait until the next appointment. I’m not going to obsess about a baby that is bigger then average. Worry a little yes… obsess – no.
Other then that, we’ve been busy buying cribs, strollers and car seats. It’s amazing how expensive everything is and how much you need of it. And then double it for twins. We’re finding a LOT of really good deals though, and have already saved 100’s of $$ over the widely advertised average prices. If we can find big ticket items for 100-200 off, well it just makes good sense to grab it.
I guess that’s about it. We’re just cruising along, trying to cover all our bases. Reading the books, trying to come up with names, trying to come up with color schemes and themes. There’s just a lot to think about – more then I ever would have imagined. It keeps us busy.
Next appointment – 22 weeks!
The Girl
The Boy
15 Weeks
Written on 26 January 2009 by AmyWe had our 15 week appointment last week, and all continues to be well. We met our new perinatologist, who seems very nice and knowledgeable. We saw the kids on the ultrasound again – still 10 fingers and 10 toes… or maybe it would be more correct to say 20 fingers and 20 toes. Anyway… it was nice to know that we’ll be in the hands of someone who specializes in high risk pregnancies. She’ll keep a closer eye on things.
We got some new photos, but I haven’t scanned them in yet. They don’t really look any different than the 13 week pics, so nothing much to see. They were growing a day ahead of schedule, and clocking in around 3.5 inches. It’s really kind of amazing because when you think about 3.5 inches it just doesn’t seem that big. However, if you have a ruler handy, take a look.. it’s a decent size! And while not fully baked, they do have all their parts pretty much in place by this point. Everything just has to get bigger.
And the big question everyone asks – what are you having? By most accounts you just can’t definitively say until between 16-20 weeks. It’s just a guess up until that point. We did, however, have both ultrasound techs at the 13 and 15 week appts “guess” that it’s one of each. Then again, our friend was told two boys and didn’t find out until they were born that she had one of each.
Between IVF and high risk, we’ve been fortunate that this was our 5th ultrasound! Many people have only had 1-2 at this point. It’s been very reassuring to see them growing and thriving. At this stage in the pregnancy you still don’t feel anything other than ill or tired. There are no kicks to let you know someone is in there. All you have is the occasional ultrasound and faith that it’s all going to work out.
Next appointment is at 18 weeks.
13 Weeks
Written on 10 January 2009 by AmyWe went to our 13 week appointment on Thursday and there was a lot of exciting stuff going on. Since we needed to get our NT Scan we had to go out to Oakland where they keep the high end scanning equipment. That allowed us to see a whole new level of detail… arms, hands, fingers, legs, brain, spine, heart, etc. It was really cool. The babies were relatively active over the course of the next hour. There were hiccups, drinking, hand waving, leg kicking and flipping around. It was surreal.
The next step was getting the testing results, which is a statistical average of how likely the babies are to having Down Syndrome, Trisomy 13 or Trisomy 18. Before coming into the test, based on my age at birth alone, our odds for Downs were 1 in 180. After the test our odds were 1 in 187. Odds for Trisomy 13 or 18 came out to about 1 in 6200. My results were in the elevated risk range and it was recommended that we get Amniocentesis to conclusively check for any chromosomal abnormalities (not just Downs).
It seemed like a no-brainer to test until we found out there is a risk of major complications from the test itself which involves sticking a needle into the amniotic sack and withdrawing amniotic fluid. The complications can range from infection, to leakage of the amniotic fluid if the hole doesn’t close properly to uterine contractions which can cause early labor and miscarriage. With a single baby the odds of complications are in the 1/400 range, but with twins (since they have to puncture both sacks) the odds are closer to 1/200.
So, if the odds of having Downs is close to 1/200 and the odds of the procedure causing a potential miscarriage are 1/200 it just didn’t make sense for us to risk the test. We wouldn’t do reduction either way, and we’ve spent too much time, effort and money getting to this point to do anything that could negatively impact the outcome. At the end of the day 1/187 is only .53%. That means our odds of having babies without Downs is 99.47%. We survived much greater odds to get to this point. I’m not going to sweat a half a percent. We’re past the first trimester and I’m ready to finally relax and enjoy this pregnancy.
Baby A -13 Weeks
Baby B - 13 Weeks
10 weeks
Written on 18 December 2008 by AmyWe had our 10-week appointment yesterday with the OB/GYN after being released from UCSF. Everything went better then expected. Both babies were measuring correctly for their age – one was spot on and one was 2 days behind which is completely normal. But the exciting part was seeing them. One was in profile and we could actually see the head and the little arms and legs. The other appeared to be facing us, and although we couldn’t see the appendages, we did see it moving around quite a bit. It was crazy and amazing!
Enjoy It While It Lasts
Written on 9 December 2008 by AmyPeople keep telling me “Enjoy it while it lasts. Once those kids come it’s all over!!” But to be perfectly honest, there is very little (to date) to enjoy about pregnancy. Now I know there are many women who go through infertility who say they’d never complain about their symptoms if they ever got pregnant. I mean, how ungrateful could I be – right? Wrong.
The truth is that it makes you feel like crap almost constantly. I’m always in a state of fatigue. Sometimes to the point of not being able to keep my eyes open at work. I sleep anywhere from 9-12 hours and supplement that with a nap on the weekends. I can’t walk from the ferry to work without stopping and resting – the same walk I’ve done twice a day for the past 14 months. I can’t make plans because inevitably I’ll be too tired to enjoy them. I get up to pee 2-5 times a night. I have almost no appetite and many food aversions (no cravings). It can be challenging to find food that doesn’t make me queasy. Thankfully I’m not actually hugging the toilet bowl like many other ladies. I think that’s my only saving grace.
Don’t get me wrong. I’m grateful and excited to be pregnant. I know a million other women would trade places with me in a minute, but for now it kind of sucks.
Still in the Running
Written on 5 December 2008 by Amy8 week ultrasound
Baby A measured 14 mm with a heartbeat at 158
Baby B measured 16 mm with a heartbeat at 172
Good stuff!
8 weeks
Written on 4 December 2008 by AmyToday marks the 8 week mark, and tomorrow we go in for our next fetal photo shoot. We’re definitely excited, but it’s undercut by the anxiety I feel.
Prior to the 6 week ultrasound I was about as anxious as I’ve ever been in my entire life. My greatest fear was that we’d gone through all this, and would end up with a blighted ovum. I’m a realist by nature – and a bit of a pessimist based on years of infertility. I told myself that if we had a good ultrasound I’d stop worrying. Imagine my surprise when they saw 2 sacs and they both had beating hearts!
For the most part I did stop worrying…until a few days ago. The anxiety is creeping back in. I’m not falling asleep easily and I wake up frequently. It’s far from the levels from a few weeks ago, but I’ll be glad to get past tomorrow with a clean bill of health.
Absent with Cause
Written on 1 December 2008 by AmyIt’s been a while since I’ve blogged. I wasn’t much in the mood. After the 2nd IVF was converted to an IUI (and predictably failed), I was in a funk. I knew we only had 1 fresh and 1 frozen transfer in front of us before it was time to call it a day and get on with our lives. The years of disappointment and credit card debt were adding up and it was time to be realistic. I started preparing myself for a life without children and it was tough.
In the meantime, we decided to do the last fresh IVF on our own without telling anyone. I was so burnt out on blogging and reading forums and answering questions that I just wanted to get it over with. I felt like I was going through the motions for what was surely bound to end in disappointment. I even started telling the family that we were going to stop trying at the end of the year, and that the odds were good that there would be no children.
On Oct 1 we embarked on our last fresh cycle. On Oct 23rd we ended up with 14 eggs, 12 of which were mature, 10 fertilized, and all 10 made it to Day 3. We were converted to a 5 day transfer, at which point there were 2 blastocysts in good shape with another 5 that they wanted to keep an eye on until the next day. We transferred 2, and 1 was still viable to freeze the next day. And then we waited.
20 minutes after Obama was declared the next President of the United States on Nov 4th, we took a test (12 DPO) and threw it on the counter. A few minutes later a faint positive line showed up and subsequent tests got darker for the next 4 days. Next we went in for blood betas and the hormones were increasing appropriately. And that brings us to 11/21 when we had our 6w1d ultrasound where they saw not 1 but 2 sacs and 2 little beating hearts.
Our next appointment is Friday for our 8-week ultrasound. There is a 20% chance that we’ll lose one of the twins (vanishing twin), and a relatively low chance we’ll lose them both. But for now we’re good and we’re happy. It’s been a long journey.