Absent with Cause
1 December 2008It’s been a while since I’ve blogged. I wasn’t much in the mood. After the 2nd IVF was converted to an IUI (and predictably failed), I was in a funk. I knew we only had 1 fresh and 1 frozen transfer in front of us before it was time to call it a day and get on with our lives. The years of disappointment and credit card debt were adding up and it was time to be realistic. I started preparing myself for a life without children and it was tough.
In the meantime, we decided to do the last fresh IVF on our own without telling anyone. I was so burnt out on blogging and reading forums and answering questions that I just wanted to get it over with. I felt like I was going through the motions for what was surely bound to end in disappointment. I even started telling the family that we were going to stop trying at the end of the year, and that the odds were good that there would be no children.
On Oct 1 we embarked on our last fresh cycle. On Oct 23rd we ended up with 14 eggs, 12 of which were mature, 10 fertilized, and all 10 made it to Day 3. We were converted to a 5 day transfer, at which point there were 2 blastocysts in good shape with another 5 that they wanted to keep an eye on until the next day. We transferred 2, and 1 was still viable to freeze the next day. And then we waited.
20 minutes after Obama was declared the next President of the United States on Nov 4th, we took a test (12 DPO) and threw it on the counter. A few minutes later a faint positive line showed up and subsequent tests got darker for the next 4 days. Next we went in for blood betas and the hormones were increasing appropriately. And that brings us to 11/21 when we had our 6w1d ultrasound where they saw not 1 but 2 sacs and 2 little beating hearts.
Our next appointment is Friday for our 8-week ultrasound. There is a 20% chance that we’ll lose one of the twins (vanishing twin), and a relatively low chance we’ll lose them both. But for now we’re good and we’re happy. It’s been a long journey.
on December 2nd, 2008 at 7:41 am
Congratulations! What exciting news!
on December 2nd, 2008 at 8:35 am
Awww…I’m so happy for you both! Congratulations and best wishes for all the wonderful memories to come!
on December 2nd, 2008 at 10:50 am
Thank you both. We’re excited/nervous/scared/etc.
on December 2nd, 2008 at 9:25 pm
Thank you for sharing your happy news! Now I have someone to live vicariously through! You both give me hope.
on December 4th, 2008 at 5:35 pm
And I have much hope for you!!! Oh, and we never did make it to Hawaii. We were supposed to stay at my dad’s house in Hilo for a few days at Thanksgiving, and then head over the Mauna Lani in Kona for a few days. After the positive tests we just didn’t know if it would be safe, or how I’d be feeling so we postponed.
on December 4th, 2008 at 9:26 pm
Well, I’m glad you didn’t make it over here for a good reason. Did you grow up in Hawaii?
I’ll keep you in my prayers and will be waiting on pins and needles to hear how well your appointment went tomorrow. I know it’s easier said than done and after all you’ve been through you’re trying to be cautiously optimistic, but try not to worry. You’ve made it this far.
on December 5th, 2008 at 7:51 am
My dad’s wife grew up in Hawaii, and they’ve been living there for about 12 years.
I’ll be sure to post the results when I can. Thanks for checking in! : )
on December 18th, 2008 at 9:19 am
I could feel the blogging burn out. I suspected that you two were going through your last cycle “privately”. I am amazed, best wishes.
on December 18th, 2008 at 10:26 am
Hey Susan – It’s been a while! Thanks for the wishes. It’s been a journey – both good and bad.